Short Story: Why Me ?!

The following story was written by:

Roxy,Q80BOY,godfather93,astarmathsandphys,necrocraft, eddie_adi619, and abdulrahman101

 (these are members of student forums

The British prime minister looked into the mirror and thought “Why me? Why did Jeremy Clarkson call me a Scottish one-eyed twit? Why did the economic crisis come up during my term and not Tony Blair’s?”  “WHY!” the prime minister cried out loud. His cold voice echoed in the room and reached Mrs. Jennifer, his newly appointed young secretary. She stormed through the door and was bewildered to see Mr. Brown wearing nothing but his boxers, “Ehmm sir, the US president is on line 2, should I tell him you will call later?” Mr. Gordon Brown replied at once, “for god’s sake give me the phone immediately. It’s the American president; you know that he’s my best mate!” Gordon answered the phone “Hey Barack, how are things going?” Mr. Obama was in the oval office; he had just signed ANOTHER treaty between Palestine and Israel “Hey Gordy, how are things going over there? Mr. Bush here wants to give you some of his personal tips over how to control your stress levels.” Gordon was excited; he started hopping up and down. “Wow-I’m gonna speak to THE George Bush, the one that killed thousands of people!!” Mr. Bush grabbed the phone. “Bonjour Monsieur Brown! Oh man, I’ve started to speak French. I have daily lessons with Nicolas Sarkozy-he’s the best teacher!! We talk about nuclear weapons and killing-oh I LOVE that man! Anyway let’s return to your stress problems… First you eat some polar bear meat-your brain will cool down until you stop thinking about anything else other than the coldness that’s enveloping you.  Then you do daily yoga exercises with your wife-this will make you ‘bond’. That’s pretty much it! For any extra tips you want to know I’ll charge a small fee of only 99999 dollars!” On the other side, Mr. Brown had already made a pizza-hut special order containing polar bear meat and some fries for his wife. The minister of health barged into the prime minister’s office. “Wait!! Don’t eat that, we have just discovered the first case of polar bear flu in the UK, and if you eat it I’m telling you, you will die-you will DIE, do you hear me?! Mr. Brown grabbed a slice of pizza and gobbled it “Hah!  You expect me to believe you?? Bird flu, cow flu, swine flu and now polar bear flu??” The minister of health became red in the face. “I’m contacting the WHO this minute!!” He stormed out the office.  Mrs. Jennifer came in and asked, “hey sir, may I have a piece?”
“What, you wanna kill yourself too?” Jennifer was embarrassed. “No sir, it’s just that I’m hungry-I’ve not eaten anything for 2 days due to the preparation of the world summit next month.”
“Well you aren’t getting any!” He snapped. The secretary ran out the office sobbing. She called her boyfriend ‘The Stig’ (He’s the guy in the white suit and helmet from Top Gear who some say when he saw star wars he thought it was a documentary.) “Stigy, honey, help me!! I’m dying of hunger and the evil prime minister is not letting me have any polar bear meat-please help!” She sobbed. “Sweetie, I’m out with another girl at the moment-I’ll call you as soon as I get home.” Jennifer collapsed in a heap and started pulling her hair. Why me… Why me… WHY MEEE?!?!

                    ***THE END***


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